Deidra, Don't Call the National Guard!

One of my sweet colleagues and dear friends sent me a message on FaceBook indicating that if I didn't send a flare up to let everyone know we're okay she was going to do something drastic. Yes, we're still here. We're without Internet and that has been a trying experience for me. Not a day goes by that God doesn't speak to me through everyday events in my life and the life of my family. I want to share what He's showing us and how He's loving us even through this difficult time. It will be awhile before we have Internet set up, so I will try to post as often as I can.

I want to share with you something that happened last week. Those of you following the blog are aware that Nathanael sustained a pretty bad injury to his arm back in March and had to be taken to the ER and then admitted for surgery. The experience was frightening because although we have three boys, they've managed to stay in one piece up until this point.

But to be honest, there was one thing about that experience that truly set me on edge. We didn't have health insurance for Nathanael at the time. When the ER doctor told us that he was transferring Nathanael over to the pediatric hospital for surgery, I had a melt down. I figured we could, in time, cover the ER bill paying a little bit every month, but the thought of what a hospital stay and surgery would cost floored me. I prayed and tried to trust that God would see us through.

Then the bill came.

$27,000 !

And then my trust was shaken. I wasn't sure how we could possibly cover that. Robert is in construction and his work has not been consistent because of the economy and to have this added to our financial burden was almost too much.

We have family devotional together daily. There are seven of us and so each person has claimed a day to lead in prayer and open God's Word in devotion for the family. Robert is Saturday, I'm Sunday, Samuel is Monday, and so on. Last Sunday I read the first two verses from Psalm 127:


Unless the LORD builds the house, they labor in vain who build it;Unless the LORD guards the city, the watchman keeps awake in vain.

It is vain for you to rise up early, to retire late, to eat the bread of painful labors;
For He gives to His beloved even in his sleep.
I shared with the children that work is good and God created us to work, but that we must remember that God is the source of our provision. That last verse stood out to me and there seemed to be something there that I couldn't put my finger on: God provides for us even in our sleep.

The next day I sent Nathanael to check the mail and he returned with the usual parcels. Among the envelopes I found one with the hospital's return address and my heart sunk. I was frightened to open it, but I knew I would have to eventually. I unfolded the letter and read it. And then I re-read it. And then I read it again. The letter indicated that the balance of our bill was $0. I was sure it must be a mistake, so I called the hospital . The woman in the billing department pulled up our account and confirmed that indeed the balance was $0. Her exact words were: the debt has been forgiven. I wept as the poor woman attempted to comfort me through the phone line.


The night before I had brooded in my heart over our situation. I shared those verses from Psalm 127 for myself as much as for my family. I needed to be reminded that He is the Great Provider. But even as I slept Sunday night, God had already provided. Even in my sleep.

How gracious my God is. Even in my doubt, He shows Himself as a loving Father. I will cling to this reminder in the days to come and as we face the hardships ahead, I will pray that God will bring this to my mind over and over again that I may praise Him for his infinite goodness and mercy.

A Few Miscellaneous Funny Sayings of Late

I have been working on structuring the kids reading time, i.e. taking out the junk food and replacing it with a little more sustenance. Kristina is now walking around with my large American Heritage Dictionary. I hope I haven't over done it. Samuel was assigned The Foxes Book of Martyrs. He came to me after having gotten a few chapters under his belt and said, "Dad this book is a bit depressing. Everybody that I have read about so far has died." So much for my previous introductory lesson on what a martyr is.

Leslie and I were having a discussion on something I read by Augustine on consecrated virgins and Joshua walking by said, "By the way who was that person called Attila the 'Nun?'

As we were talking about our lunch options Kristina, still struggling a little with the language a bit, suggested that we eat at a favorite Mexican place of ours Tijuana Flats. She accidentally said "Marijuana Flats"!

Let the Games Begin

We made it to the pool yesterday to cool down from the Florida sun. I settled into a chair riveted by Melissa Faye Green's There is No Me Without You. The typical swim races between Robert and the kids took place and eventually I heard Kristina's protest coming from the shallow end. I looked up to see Kristina standing about midway between Sam and Nathanael who were playing polar opposites.
"What's the problem?" I called over the top of my book.
"Mom, the boys aren't being fair. They won't let me play," Kristina informed me. I saw a drenched tennis ball arc high over her head and be caught by Samuel as Kristina attempted to intercept it.
"Well, what are you playing?" I asked.
"Keep away," Nathanael informed me. I laughed at Kristina's obvious frustration as she hopped back and forth between her older brothers.
"Honey, that's the point of the game. They're trying to keep you from getting the ball. You know - 'keep away'?'
She stopped and stared at me, water dripping from her face, "Well what kind of game is that???"

Call for Prayer

The governing body of Ukraine is set to vote on a bill tomorrow (June 2nd) that will forever change the face of orphan ministry in that country. If passed, there will be a moratorium placed on international adoptions. In other words, no more adoptions. The bill would also limit contact with orphans in orphanages to ONLY those who are official workers and other governmental officials. Please pray for the officials considering this bill, the children it would affect, and the families in the process of adopting.

UPDATE: The law was taken off today's agenda and was not voted on. Speculation remains whether it will resurface in July, but there is mixed information coming from facilitators at this point. Please continue to pray for those families in country and those who are planning on traveling soon.

Greetings from . . .

Much to my chagrin, I made an ironic observation this past week. We have a cat. Her name is Jetta and she is very much her own animal. She is not like our Jack cat who would allow us to scoop him up and nuzzle him. She pretty much does her own thing and believes she is blessing us with her presence if she simply passes through the room we're located in. And while Jetta has a list of things she does not appreciate (like nuzzling), there is one thing that truly freaks of her out: the car. We've been back and forth between Mississippi and Florida several times in the last eleven months. Each time, Jetta is packed away in the pet carrier and secured in the rear of the vehicle. Nevertheless, she proceeds to meow her protests. For hours. Like for eight of the eleven hour drive. When Robert was driving to Florida by himself back in March, I called every few hours to check on him and in the background I could hear Jetta fussing with a monotonous stream of "meow, meow, meow, meow".

The funny thing is, Jetta hated Mississippi. She loves our house in Florida and the familiar territory. When Robert arrived at the house and let her out of the carrier she was happy as could be. She recognized home and rolled around on the sidewalk to show her appreciation for being there.

Listening to Jetta's protests on the drive back to Florida earlier this week, I thought to myself, "If you would just shut up already, I'm taking you to a place you'll like better. You'll be happy when you get there. Trust me!" I was suddenly struck with the realization that I'm a lot like that stubborn cat.

Although my last post promised that I would find joy in whatever direction God sent us, the realization that we would have to leave Mississippi hit me hard. I wept, grieved, and questioned God. I have never prayed more or sought God more than I have in the last few weeks. But when God's will was revealed, I failed to embrace it gracefully. We sat in our home church this morning and I just cried. This was the same place I cried over leaving eleven months ago. Now I was crying because God had sent me back? I think my grief has more to do with not understanding why. A large part of my rebellious nature wants to demand an explanation from God. And I grieve over the fact that my heart is like that. I want to understand things, not necessarily trust God. Could He have something better planned here for us? I fail to see that even when I know how good and gracious He is by nature. I tend to just sit there and meow my protests from the backseat. Pray for me.

Trust in the LORD with all your heart,
and do not lean on your own understanding.
In all your ways acknowledge him,
and he will make straight your paths.
-Proverbs 3:5-6

Seeking the Source

The end of the school year is always a whirlwind for teachers, but I have mixed emotions this time around. I have been challenged more professionally, mentally, and spiritually this year than in any of my other years of teaching. I have found God in the challenges that came with relocating to Mississippi.

One of my sweet colleagues noticed I was a bit quieter and introspective today at lunch and commented, "Leslie, I can't imagine what you'd be like if you didn't have all these pressures on you. I wish you hadn't had to struggle with the transition." I assured her that they were more of a blessing to me than I could ever be to them (so true), but I was thankful for the struggles of the past year. It's important for me to remember where my strength and security resides. I wouldn't trade this year's challenges for anything.

School will be out in eight days. In eight days I will know if we're moving back to Florida or staying in Mississippi. My heart is torn over the possibilities. Not so long ago, I was missing our little house in Florida. I was missing our friends. I was missing our home church. I was missing the familiarity of our routine.

Nothing went smoothly when we moved here. We lost our beloved cat Jack. Our original housing plans fell through. We had one financial set back after the next with unexpected medical and mechanical bills. I searched for God where I couldn't make sense of things. He used the challenges to draw me to Him slowly. In the midst of the chaos, I found He was the only stable thing. Clinging to that security gave me great liberty and I came to love that which drew me to Him, good and bad.

Ten months later, I love teaching here. I love my colleagues. I love the community I serve. I love the possibilities I see for orphan ministry here. I love Mississippi. For quite some time I cried out and begged God to give us a way to stay. And then I considered the possibility that this calling to Mississippi was just for a season. Perhaps it has been a learning experience and a temporary bit of Utopia. I stopped asking to stay and started asking for His will to be done. I understand now that I will only find joy and security in His perfect will - and that is good enough for me.

So for those of you so inclined, please pray that God's will would be done in the next few days and that I will praise Him for it - whether that send us back to Florida or keeps us in Mississippi.

Blessed is the man who trusts in the LORD
And whose trust is the LORD.
"For he will be like a tree planted by the water,
That extends its roots by a stream
And will not fear when the heat comes;
But its leaves will be green,
And it will not be anxious in a year of drought
Nor cease to yield fruit.
-Jeremiah 17:7-8

Good Things Come to Those Who Wait

Hannah's current favorite singer is Taylor Swift, so when I heard she was coming in concert I was poised to purchase my tickets through Ticketmaster the moment they went on sale. However, history repeated itself and the show sold out in minutes before I even got my call through (just like the Hannah Montana concert in Orlando last year). I was disappointed because Hannah's birthday is this month and I knew she would have loved to go. I've checked eBay and Craigslist over the last two months, but the tickets were going at scalper prices and I simply couldn't and wouldn't go there. And then earlier this week, I got an email from an individual who had three tickets and wasn't going to be able to make it. It was almost too good to be true, but we worked out a deal that got us into the concert for almost half the face value of the tickets!!! The gentleman overnighted the tickets to us and I presented them to a half hyperventilating, dancing Hannah and Kristina. The girls and I headed to the Gulf Coast for the show on Saturday night. Kellie Pickler and the group Gloriana opened for Taylor Swift. The seats were amazing, the show was amazing - we couldn't have asked for a better night!