Sunday, February 22, 2009

Unbreakable


Two are better than one because they have a good return for their labor.
For if either of them falls, the one will lift up his companion. But woe to the one who falls when there is not another to lift him up.
Furthermore, if two lie down together they keep warm, but how can one be warm alone?
And if one can overpower him who is alone, two can resist him. A cord of three strands is not quickly torn apart.
-Ecclesiastes 4:9-12


Last Thursday night I was literally at the end of my proverbial rope. I was frantically trying to help Nathanael construct a mosaic for an ancient Rome project and Samuel cook Tiger Sweets for an ancient Egypt project. Somewhere in the midst of supervising wet cement pouring and cooking one of the oldest known recipes to man, I felt myself unraveling. Hannah still needed help with math, Kristina wanted to bounce ideas off of me for a project due next week, Joshua needed a special lunch packed for his field trip the next day, and a stack of ungraded essays beckoned impatiently from the other room. God has brought the above verse to mind when I've felt overwhelmed in the last few weeks. He has reminded me that I'm not alone.

Robert came in Saturday morning and I can honestly say "phew!". We are all so happy to have him here for a few days! We've easily fallen back into our comfortable routine. Robert and the boys watching old horror movies, Robert teasing Kristina like a smitten eight year old, the humor of filling up an entire row of pews at church. It's good to be together again.

Even with all there is to keep me busy, my heart has been heavy recently with adoption issues. We've been talking about adopting again for some time and so the topic isn't necessarily new. I immediately broached the subject to see where he was with all of it.

"Honey, I really feel burdened to return to Ukraine. I know the timing is terrible and finances couldn't be worse, but I really want to go."

"Okay."

"Okay? I mean, I'm not necessarily talking about returning to Odessa. I feel like there's another area I should visit with children in more dire circumstances."

"Okay."

It was the same nonchalance with which he greeted my suggestion about adopting an older child two years ago. Such a sweet man. He humors me, but I know he would buy the plane ticket tomorrow if we could and let me follow my heart. I am so grateful to have a husband who shares my desire to love these children.

And there is a child. This child may simply be another "Sophia" meant to lead our hearts in trusting God, but the child is there nonetheless. I've stared at the photo saved to my laptop repeatedly over the last month. I check my email constantly hoping for some further information or photos from other families who have recently visited the orphanage. Why now? Why am I so drawn? I hesitate to even share this, but I'm hoping you'll pray. Pray that God will make His will clear and fill us with faith for whatever He calls us to. It is not good that any child should be alone. Pray that God will provide a family for this child . . . to lift up, to keep warm, to protect . . . whoever that may be.

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